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| Kasen and Mommy's nightly bedtime reading before the dreaded "Progressive Waiting Method" sleep training |
So our little man, at 7.5 months has not
slept through the night since he was 4 months of age when he started teething.
That equates to 3.5 months of nearly sleepless nights for mommy. While I
realize that Kasen will not be small forever and given that I don't get to
spend as much time with him during the week that I should cherish the moments we
have together cuddling in the wee hours of morning, the number of wakings had
become unbearable. I was okay with Kasen waking up 2X per night to feed. This
was probably the case from 4 months to about 6.5 months. But starting at 6.5
months Kasen started to get up not 3 - not 4 - but sometimes 6 times! Yesterday
morning I reached a point of desperation because I simply was resenting being
so sleep deprived - I recognized that I was starting to break down completely.
We also realized that for the most part he was comfort eating - because once he
fussed, I would pick him up (unknowingly rewarding his bad behavior!) and rock
or hold him back to sleep before putting him in his crib again. Talking to
other mommies and doing lots of research made me realize that the older they
got, the more potentially wakeful they are in the middle of the night - which
means one of the most important skills they will need to learn is how to
self-soothe and fall asleep on their own.
Realizing this was both a rude awakening but a determination to also fix the problem. I didn't want to resort to the Ferber method but we did. My husband was a huge supporter as he thought it was important to teach him those crucial sleep skills. I was not so much. The thought of my adorable flesh and blood writhing and crying and wailing uncontrollably made my stomach turn. I don't know how I didn't cry, but I tried to keep myself busy - folding his laundry, washing his bottles, making purees (his favorite - mango to be exact!).
We started his bedtime routine around 7:30pm. We gave him his bath, then at 8pm started to do our usual - we read him several books before bedtime, then we end it with an electronic book called "Goodnight Scout." Then we played the soothing bedtime music from the book while he had his last bottle, and as he was getting drowsy we put him in his crib around 8:30pm, continuing to play the same music from his book. Man, did he wake right up! He knew right away that he was not going to be able to fall asleep in my arms like normal. He cried for about 25 minutes until 8:55pm and then fell asleep. He woke up at 11:30pm, we changed his diaper because apparently we didn't close his diaper tight enough and he peed on himself , then he proceeded to cry for an hour. I thought it was odd that it was taking him longer to fall asleep the second time around after taking 25 minutes to fall asleep the first time. I went with my instinct and fed him - he was actually hungry, sucked down all 5 oz, was drowsy, and again I put him in his crib drowsy but awake at 12:30am. He cried for 15 minutes then went to sleep on his side fetal position style, clutching his blanket. And he woke up this morning at 5:45am! I couldn't believe it. There's hope!!!! My guess is that if he truly can't put himself back to sleep in a half hour he really is hungry (as opposed to just comfort feeding).
Despite all of the agony, guilt, and torture I felt all night
long (they do say that it is tougher on the parents than on the baby, but gaah,
I am convinced he will remember)! I would say Night 1 was pretty successful. I
hope that this is pre-cursor of good things to come. Although my husband and I
are arguing about whether or not I should have fed him. The way I see it is
this: we teach him the self-soothe skills, and if he can't put himself back to
sleep after a half hour, then my guess is that he is truly hungry, but after he
is full I would proceed with the same process as before - putting him in his
crib drowsy but awake. Crossing fingers that tonight will be better.
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